This is a fact, because I read it in a book. “If Jell-O is hooked up to an EEG, it registers movements virtually identical to the brain waves of a healthy adult.”

In that case, what is that Jell-O thinking?

It’s imagining the parties it’s going to, and wondering what fruit it should wear. Tasteful mandarin orange slices, or daring tropical fruit cocktail? Maybe it should disgust the neighbors by wearing inappropriate semi-sweet chocolate chips? The Jell-O chuckles when it imagines the neighbor whispering under his breath, “Chocolate chips on Jell-O? Next it’ll be wearing potato chips.” (Jell-O only ever chuckles. Belly laughs cause unsightly cracks.)

Or it’s thinking, I remember when I was young. The days of Jell-O shots. But I don’t mix well with liquor anymore.

Or it thinks just like a human. In that case, it’s wondering whatever happened to that singing group Kris Kross that started a wear-your-clothes-backwards fad that lasted about two days in the 1990s.

The book the fact is from is called Who Knew? By David Hoffman. In case you were wondering.

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